Old Soldier Blues

by @berni1954

NSFW Skirmish: Slightly Askew (@atornberg)
Old Soldier Blues
berni1954
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Liner Notes

This one was written for the "Slightly Askew" skirmish.
12 hours later though.

We were asked to write about things we would like to get to perfection but fail to achieve. At my age I knew what I was going to write about. So in the old tradition of 8 Bar Blues with lyrics that are on the surface about one thing, but may be taken to be about quite another, here is "Old Soldier Blues"

NOTE: "The Jakes " is a British Military term for what the US euphemistically calls "the Bathroom"

The instrument is a Baton Rouge 8 String Baritone Ukulele (Great value for money Baton Rouge Instruments)
#fuc #baritoneukulele

Lyrics

My old soldier won't stand to attention
He's got sloppy in his old age
His discipline he's long forgotten
He and I are not on the same page

Once he stood proud as punch
Rigidly, he took to any task
Now he won't do his duty when its needed
No matter how I take him to task

I know that old age has excuses
But his perfection I often recall
He's slovenly today not like the old times
When he'd stand for hours if he was on call

I think his dereliction to duty
Might be due to the pills that he takes
They seem to make it harder to arouse him
They leave him prostrate even in the jakes

Repeat Vs 1

Comments

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oh this is priceless! i love it! you took that idea and really nailed it!! a blast out of the 1920's or 30s in its own way- great choice of instrument, too (and now I want one of those!) and glad you defined 'jakes' which i had no idea what it meant till i read your notes.
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TMI? 😁
I love the laid back relaxed delivery - it seems so very appropriate for the subject matter. Knowing how to deal with those slovenly lazy soldiers in a timely manner can help win any battle and penetrate through the front line I suspect… although it’s been a long time since a knew a soldier …
[avatar]
Woo hoo..love it. I always enjoy your blues songs..and this is a blues song.
Looking foward to more songs...so keep it up. Lol.
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holy double entendres, batman! good luck getting this one past the (non-existent) censors! ;)
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I used to joke as long as the hydraulics still work, back when they still did. Very clever. Went right over people's heads! At ease!
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ha ha very funny, could almost be about a soldier as well! made me laugh!
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I love it! Very good take on the prompt and hilarious metaphors! Nice work! You said it was NSFW, but I would disagree. What did you actually say that was NSFW? That's the beauty of what you did here.
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At ease, soldier, at ease...

Laughed out loud at this one. Great job! ❤️
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ha ha - war is a job for young soldiers
real good write berni
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its not just the youth who are slackers. you make a very visual case for the laxity of this old soldier. i think that if one stays in any profession for to long, they get sloppy.
[FAWM]