5090 by FAWM: "The Girl On A Train"

The Girl On A Train

8 weeks ago by @esc4p3

There is no demo for this song.

Liner Notes

I'm still allowing my brain to spew out lyrics and then persuading myself to be brave and actually post them.

This one popped out last night although it doesn't seem to have a chorus and also has some kind of refrain at the end. Not sure what to make of it, but you are witnessing a man learning how to write lyrics/dittys 'live on air'. So rather than me judge it and never get any further, I welcome both feedback and a collaborater who might be able to turn it into a song?!

#needsmusic #needscollab

Lyrics

I saw her once, sitting on the train
Not sure that I’d ever see her again
Killer heels, long blonde hair
Minding her business, just sitting there

Just a fleeting moment, two station stops
Her beauty so great, made my jaw drop
I tried so hard to catch her eye
My heart racing so fast, felt like I was high

Oh beautiful woman, where did you go
You got off way to soon, I just have to know
Did you see me at all, my face was all red
The thought of not seeing you, fills me with dread

I’m on the same train the very next day
If I see you again, I’ll be on heavens stairway
The train stops where you got on before
I start to sweat, my eyes pinned to the door

There you are, my heart jumps out my chest
Man this love thing, sure gets me all stressed
This time I think I just might be in luck
She looks me in the eye, I am lovestruck

I move over to sit next to her, no going back now
I turn to speak and the words come out somehow
“Hi I saw you before, do you fancy a date”
She looked at me I saw her eyes both dilate

That my friends was 25 years ago
She was my girl and I was her beau
If I hadn’t done, what I did that day
My life would have been worse, in every way

Never once hesitate
Go out on that date
Joy for you awaits
Find your soul mate
No time to ruminate
Or procrastinate
Now before it’s too late
This love is your fate!

Comments

@gm7 6w

Cool story..I think we have all had that experience..but many of us never had the nerve to sit next to the person and take the next step..nice write.

@nancycunning 8w

Oh, this was fun to sing and strum along too. It feels like a kind of shotgun percussive talky rhythm - a little like the rumble of the train. At first I felt like the third section would make a good chorus, but as I went on, it felt like the older verse, verse, verse, verse structure worked really well for a story about a train - and then that last section can be a kind of moral to the story that sits a little differently from the rest.

@florian 8w

Agree with @nahlej381: nice one! Regarding the chorus: how about repeating that end chorus once in the middle by adjusting the "do not hesitate" lines so they refer to his idea of getting on the train again?